As we enter the penultimate day of NoBloBopSheBopSheBop, I was fretting. The tank was empty, the brain a shrivelled cranio-raisin, the mind a blank. Oh, Lords of Weirdness, quoth I in desperation, send unto me a miracle of the absurd. And there was a loud Hosanna, and a fusillade of trumpets did sound, and magically my browser of its own accord bestowed upon me this boon:
It is called the TwoDaLoo, and it is a real, $1400 toilet for two. It supposedly can help a rocky marriage recover by promoting increased closeness, and I know I can't count the number of times I thought to myself, "I really love my wife, but wouldn't it be nice if we could crap together, too?"
But wait dear Marius, some of you might utter. Did not the jesters of Saturday Night Live make of this concept a sketch-like thing? Ah, yes my child. They did indeed
Isn't it wonderful that just when you have given up on figuring out why things went the way they did, the Universe offers up the answers? Now I see what went wrong with all those women in the past. If only we could have not wasted those minutes spent in agonizing lavatorial seclusion, I might have been celebrating my 30th wedding anniversary along with our 15 children today. Oh cruel Providence! Why did you take so long to create this marvelous device?!
And the comedy doesn't stop with just the photo. The write up for this ridiculous thing is equally ludicrous. Behold:
The TwoDaLoo is billed as the world's first toilet two people can use ... at the exact same time. It brings couples closer together and conserves our water supply all with one flush. The TwoDaLoo features two side-by-side toilet seats with a modest privacy wall in between. An upgraded version includes a seven inch LCD television and iPod docking station
So the double shitter promises to bring couples 'closer together' yet offers an optional TV and Ipod dock just in case you get bored with each other? Priceless.
And now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to wake my wife up so we can take a leak.