Tuesday, September 13, 2005

A Revelation, and A Request

This past weekend my former Artistic Director back in Louisiana got married. I was invited, but due to many reasons, not the least of which being that God smote most of the roadways twixt here and there, I was unable to attend. Yesterday I was chatting with one of the students who did go to the wedding, and she said that she didn't get to dance at the reception. I asked her why, and she said that the music was mostly 80's rock, and while she really likes that music, she would have to look too stupid to dance to it. And I realized that that is exactly why I don't dance. That is the era I learned to dance in, and she's right. 80's dancing looked more like an epileptic seizure rather than any sort of premeditated activity.

Now the request. I have been noticing for a while now just how many people don't really understand most of the science that governs our daily lives. I have made science a hobby, and many of the things I consider common knowledge aren't all that common. So if you have a question about how, or why, or what please let me know and I will do my best to get you an answer that doesn't involve imaginary numbers, or 11 dimensional thinking. :-)



Jeff said...

In non-Euclidean Geometry why is the sum of the angles of a triangle always greater than 180 degrees? Or more practically, why does the shortest route from Florida to the Philippines go through Alaska?

If a non-competitive biological environment could exist, would evolutionary speciation exist?

Is glass liquid or solid?

What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow? :)

Marius said...

Question 1: Hmm, I suspect it has something to do with the triune battle between C'thulhu, Godzilla, and The Flying Spaghetti Monster as they vie for supremacy. The resultant disturbance of the space/time continuum causes cosmic strings to vibrate in reverse, thereby creating an environment where gravitationl acceleration is no longer a constant, thus rendering all honey roasted peanuts null and void, and all in-flight films to be dominated by Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider.

Question 2) This would result in a planet-enveloping, homogenous biomass that would have wisdom beyond that of mere mortals, giving rise to a theoretical mono-society whose merest pre-coffee ruminations would make Stephen Hawking seem like Jessica Simpson.

Question 3) 42

Question 4) I don't know that...aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!

rosebuckle said...

I will confirm the answer to question 3.

Next Question: RevAlation? or RevElation? This is college level writing, right?

Anonymous said...

Marius you are a sinner and a fool. This "science" you speak of is nothing more than the liberal media's attempt to take religion out of the classroom. I would NEVER allow my children to step foot in a class that did not begin and end with prayer. Did you know the word "science" only appears in the Bible twice? On the other hand, the word "sinner" is mentioned over fifty times! shame Marius Shame!

Turtle said...

Okay, Mr. Science... Why does Joh Roberts bring his kids in for his confirmation hearing? What does a cutesy photo op have to do with his abilities to make fair and balanced decisions? And why is this shamless ploy so damned effective? "Ah, he has kids! He must be qualified!" WTF, Marius? Has the human spirit devolved so much that we are now nothing but sheep? Let's completely avoid and skip around the important issues and go, "Bah, bah, how cute." Why, Mr. Science, why?

Marius said...

Ok, spelling errors have been rectified, and politicians are all opportunistic, superficial, camera sluts who think nothing of whoring their children whenever a news team is watching, even though all the kiddies' presence proves is that Roberts 1. got laid, and 2. wasn't sterile. I didn't mind Roberts as a justice, but to put the rookie in as Chief Justice is just plain stupid.

joshua hanauer said...


question 4

you need to consult dr. shawn graham who noted that the average air speed velocity of an unladen (south african) swallow is indeed 4.5 bpm. slightly less for the european.

heff said...

Why do birds suddenly appear, just because you are near?

What the heck is James Brown really saying?