Howdy folks. I planned to devote this entry to the Tom Delay indictment, but after trying to research it, I find I would much rather cut my own head off with a rusty bandsaw blade. This indictment is so weak that even Bill Clinton could have shrugged it off. This will be, unfortunately, merely a hiccup in the career of evil that is our House Majority Leader. So let us move on to more pressing issues.
Just in case you were concerned that the airline industry isn't doing enough to keep flights safe after 9/11, I give you this little tidbit. Three flight attendant unions are calling for a boycott of Jodie Foster's new movie Flightplan because: spoiler alert! spoiler alert! spoiler alert! spoiler alert!
the flight attendant is the bad guy. GASP!!!!!!! Apparently it is now unthinkable for a movie to portray anyone, from any race, creed, gender, or occupation as a villain without some support group screaming about it. I guess all movie villains must be alien robots who have absolutely no agenda, and can only kill big tobacco executives and rabid pitbulls. Give me a fucking break!!
Are the flight attendant unions so unoccupied with the real problems of an industry that is going down faster than Alanis Morrisette in a movie theatre that they have time to worry about a film? Movies are fiction, and not usually very good fiction at that. If I ran into Elijah Wood at a restaurant tomorrow I would neither expect him to be three feet tall, nor would I wonder how he grew his arms and legs back. That's because he's an actor, not a Hobbit or cannibalistic serial killer. I don't hate all robots because of The Terminator, nor do I run screaming and lock myself in my car every time I see a St. Bernard. These are works of fiction, and I am so sick of special interest groups caterwauling every time one of their own is portrayed as the villain. I'm a bald, white guy, but I don't raise a stink every time Vin Diesel releases one of his cinematic stink-bombs.
The US is the melting pot of the world. The word 'minority' is rapidly losing its meaning here, the same with the word 'majority'. Once you get a few miles away from the frightening, creamy white, inbred center of this great nation you find a level of cultural diversity that makes the UN look like a KKK meeting. It has become something of a status symbol to be part of a minority now. But you can't get minority status just by asking for it. There are still large minority populations in the US who are set aside by their country of birth, or the color of their skin, or the shape of their eyes, and these people are genuinely oppressed and discriminated against. People who choose to go into one career or another don't get to jump on that bandwagon. Flight attendants are the same as you and me. You didn't hear the pilots' unions yelling that not all their pilots are child molesters after Airplane came out. They got the joke. So flight attendants let me say this. I respect what you do, and I know you get more shit then you deserve from crass, drunken assholes who you can't ask to leave at 35,000 feet, but that's where it ends. You are as valid a target for fiction as anyone else in the world. Now give me my fucking peanuts!
Love ya, mean it. :-)
Marius
4 comments:
Oh, dear sweet heavens, Marius! Please tell me that you did NOT just compare yourself to Vin Diesel? That'd be like me comparing myself to Pierce Brosnan, because we both have black hair.... As for the rest of it, I concur.
My friend, you have thoroughly grasped the ludicracity of the comparison, which was the point. No one would believe that I could identify with a skinny little sissy-boy like Diesel. ;-)
Vin Diesel...
Not on The List.
Just replaced Harrison Ford with Gary Sinise, though
Yes, as hard as it is to admit, even for us XY types, Mr. Ford is getting a bit long in the tooth. It amazes me that they are still talking about a fourth Indiana Jones movie. Maybe it'll take place in a nursing home. That's it! Raiders of the Lost Colostomy Bag.
(ok, I deserve a time-out for that one)
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