Tuesday, December 11, 2007

What? Another One?!


Well, it's just a blogtastic Marius-binge today. On my way to and from work I pass over one big bridge, and several smaller ones, and off to the sides are various beaches and shoals where folks participate in all sorts of aquatic recreation including fishing. Now in the interest of full disclosure I am not a fisherman. Unless it's with a bunch of friends on a boat I find fishing to be second only to Olympic Paint Drying in the most boring thing ever category. But I do not begrudge others their sport. There is one thing about fishing, however, that puzzles me. Animal rights groups lose their minds if someone abuses a mammal, no matter how high they rank on the vermin scale, but fish are caught and killed in the most horrific fashions, yet nary a peep from PETA. If someone were hunting deer with baited meat hooks driven through the deer's face, then dragged the animal hundreds of yards only to slice its still living belly open and dump its entrails on the ground the howls of protest would echo from sea to shining sea. Yet that's just what my father did the one time I remember going fishing with him. Again, I don't really have a problem with this. We are a predator species and fish have the misfortune to occupy a lower, and very tasty, rung on the evolutionary ladder, but the lack of righteous indignation seems odd to me.

On a more personal note, today I am truly a married man. It took five years, but my wife finally asked me to pick up tampons on the way home today. Contrary to popular wisdom there were no construction workers waiting by the register to ridicule me, the lovely young cashier did not look upon me with a pity in her eyes, and as far as I can tell my nards are the same size as when I entered the store. Of course, I still have yet to face the dreaded day when the young'n will need a similar errand run. Then you might hear some weeping, and maybe the unmistakable sound of a grown man hiding in the closet.

Later, my peeps.
Marius

7 comments:

Monkey said...

wow!I have never asked Mr. Monkey to do that- seriously, Mr. Monkey cannot even bring himself to purchase toilet paper.
You are a stallion!

rosebuckle said...

I have often wondered the same thing about fishing. As near as I can figure, it's because of the cold unblinking eyes. Oh, and they make no noise, so it's OK to bash their heads on the bottom of the boat. :)

Anonymous said...

"You are a stallion!"
for buying TAMONS????
For THAT you are a stallion????


Hahahahahahahahahhaha
hahahahahhahahahahaha
hahahahahahhahahahahaha

OMG! I just peed myself.

Congrats on being a big boy now...
it's not like you have to wear them or deal with them in
a "delicate" way.

Oh, and fishing would be my own
private hell...that and listening
to hours of WHAM.

Turtle said...

Comedian Bill Engvall has a pretty funny skit involving having to buy pads for his teenaged daughter...

It really is no big deal. I wouldn't hesitate to go to the store to get medicine for my dear one, so why should "feminine hygene products" be any different.

Don't know why PETA doesn't go after fishermen. Hell, they protest at Hoggetowne every year, trying to send an Indian elephant back home to Africa, so they've proven they're not entirely too bright...

And those who bash fishing, or find it boring, are missing the point entirely. It isn't about "the hunt". It isn't about "the fight". It isn't about the trophies. It isn't about being manly and bashing around smaller critters. (Okay, it IS about these things, but only to a minor degree...) It isn't even about putting seafood on the table, though that is the biggest bonus. It is about getting away from it all. You don't fish in your living room. You don't fish in the office. You go out to the lake or ocean, where it is peaceful and quiet. You leave all your worries at home. The whole point is about relaxing. Unwinding. Yes, it can be boring. That's the whole idea! Just think of it as yoga in a boat. Without the contortions. And you don't get dinner with yoga...

Rico said...

When buying pads/tampons for the women in the house I make a point of looking straight into the cashier's eyes, and using my best pirate voice, I say, "They're for me."

And Turtle has it dead on about fishing. Sometimes I won't bait the hook because I don't want any fish demanding some of my time.

Stinkypaw said...

I don't think I ever asked Hubby for that... but he knows what being a married man is all about nonetheless!

celebhith said...

Today you are a man! Mazel tov!

And I agree with you about PETA and fishing! Talk about picking and choosing which causes to champion. If it's cute and cuddly, they'll protect it to high heaven! But not the not-so-cute-and-cuddlies. Hmmmph!