One of the many groovy aspects of my new gig is that the campus is a wildlife preserve, so there are lots of nifty critters roaming around. Among the more common are the egrets. Most of them are about 4 feet tall, mostly legs and necks, but as I watch them wander around the lakes looking for nummies I can't help but think of dinosaurs. I don't know if I would have made this connection on my own, but watching the slow, methodical, undulating movements of these sinuous beasties one can definately imagine what it must have been like when their scaly ancestors roamed the Earth.
On a completely unrelated note I have a question. I was listening to a song the other day that is about a guy who cheated on his lady and is trying to explain it away with a chorus of 'I didn't feel a thing. It didn't mean a thing'. That got me thinking, if my wife ever cheated on me I think I would be more upset if it didn't mean a thing. I could more readily understand an affair of overwhelming passion than I could 'hi, you're cute, let's do it'. I have never, to my knowledge anyway, been cheated on, so this is strictly hypothetical, but I'm curious about what you think? Is the classic 'she didn't mean anything to me' line soothing, or exacerbating? Or is this a gross oversimplification?
TTFN,
Marius
6 comments:
When I saw the title I thought this was going to be a confession about hitting birds with your car........
As for cheating. I think it is a very serious thing. Yes, I would be hurt if the affair meant nothing- making me feel my feelings mean less than nothing. But, a real affair with feelings? I do not know how you bounce back from that. If my husband declared love for someone else, I think I'd be over.
Either way, I do not think I could stay with my spouse if he cheated on me. I wouldn't trust him anymore. And if I couldn't trust him, I doubt I could love him.
ahahhha...I agree with monkey, I thought ...eeeewww! he EATS them! You just had to go and open pandora's box didn't you...this is a very tough topic, it's one of those damned if you do and damned if you don't.
To me the bottom line is you cheated, it hurts either way, with or without feelings involved! I also agree with monkey on something else, I could never trust him, IF, hypothetically speaking, you stayed together after what hapened every time he/she would walk out the door you would think is she/he going to meet with someone else.
It would eat you alive and you wouldn't have a happy relationship.
Anyway, that's what I think.
BTW...what we talked about yesterday, three down, one to go!
Love,
Mayi
All around hard topic.
Egrets are f**kers.
Now the other topic.
I think if your wife cheated on you, you'd be upset either way...
because she cheated on "you" and not a hypothetical.
"soothing, or exacerbating?"
Soothing?...really?? I can't imagine soothing. In the end, it's just semantics. A poke is a poke.
Cheated on is also a term folks like to categoize.
My definition is: If you are doing or saying something to someone else that you sure as hell woudn't do with your "loved one" standing right there...then you're not being true or "honorable?"
It's not appropriate...and most of us know just where the line is, even when spirits are involved.
"Hi you're cute, let's do it" is great...as long as no one else is involved. If being with just one person just isn't your thing let your "loved one" go find someone who will be. Pretty simple.
Once that trust is broken you can bet it's left a wound. And not some great heroic break that is mended and stronger at the broken parts...it is a deep wound "as dark as pitch" and you are never the same for it.
Some people say they can come back from it and go on loving and believeing. I could not.
Hope the insight helped you.
K/P
I'm with monkey and K/P. . . which is not to say I haven't made my share of mistakes in the past (VERY distant past), but cheating is cheating and there's virtually no way to get that trust back unless you're a freakin' saint. And/or you cut off his d*ck.
My thoughts on the cheating thins is that if it 'meant nothing', then why the hell did they do it? Plus yes, there is no way back from cheating. Praps i'm speaking from a raw place just now, but celebhiths suggestion would be most soothing.
Didn't know those birds were called "egrets" I thought you were just being "marius" and doing a little word-play type thing...
As for cheaters, I think that people who do it are only doing it because they are too coward to admit they want out and that's the "easy" way out... I would be hurt and that is not something I would NOT be willing to forgive. Once my trust is broken, bye bye baby! If it was only for pure pleasure, then give yourself a hand job, that will really mean nothing.
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